Real life seems intent on throwing more curveballs at me. My mother had a breast scan which revealed the early stages of cancer. She opted for a mastectomy over minor surgery plus radiotherapy. So I’ve had to take out more time to support my terminally ill father while she recovers. As a result means that I’ve had to scale back my online time, which affects my ability to interact with Kittlen.
There is another curveball that I want to discuss. One that came at both Kittlen and myself several months ago, and whose effects we are both still dealing. This one has a name—Coyote.
Coyote had been one of Ezee’s girls, along with Kittlen, up until a few years ago. I’ve blogged before about the sorry saga of how Ezee abused and abandoned them. As part of the agreement to become Kittlen’s dominant, I reached out to Coyote as well as several others who had looked to either Ezee or Kittlen in the past.
Coyote and Kittlen were good friends, and together with me formed the ’mischief trio’. We looked out for one another and helped when we could. But that was a tall order at times when it came to Coyote because she was running amok, simultaneously wanting help but being unwilling to accept it. She suffered from black moods and panic attacks as a result of past abuse.
It was the reappearance of a man named Greg—who’d stalked Coyote in the past and harassed Kittlen—that set the curveball in motion.
Coyote has landed a job as DJ for a dance troupe who were performing at the Fantasy Faire in Second Life. Unfortunately, Greg showed up around the time of one of these shows, sending Coyote into a meltdown and crying out for help. Kittlen was busy DJ-ing at YouMustObey but managed to pull Coyote to her. Unity, my mentor and owner, was in attendance and offered her assistance.
I wasn’t online at the time. When I did arrive, the situation appeared to have been resolved, at least in the short term.
Several weeks went by, and I didn’t give the incident much more thought. Then the curveball appeared.
Coyote started making allegations, lots of them, to anyone who would listen. About how Unity had ’mind raped’ her, and Kittlen had allowed this to happen. These allegations had the effect of souring relationships between Unity and others in Second Life, and she had to spend time and energy to repair the damage caused. Eleanor also got caught up in this mess, resulting in at least one of her submissives parting ways.
I was scrambling to find out what the heck had gone on. Eventually, I got to see the chat logs from at the time that Coyote was at YouMustObey receiving emotional support. Unity had used her words to try and calm Coyote down, but Coyote had snapped out of it because of Unity’s choice of words. But Unity had been helping Coyote, not attacking her.
At this point, I was still willing to hold out an olive branch to Coyote. But then she did several things that made me see her in a new light.
First, she got Penalt, Kittlen’s real-life husband, to take her side against both Kittlen and Unity. Coyote had been doing D/s play with Penalt for a while before this episode, and he rode in as her white knight. It was claimed—without much evidence besides some chat logs from a Discord server somewhere—that YouMustObey is a cult with Unity at its head. Kittlen received the clear message that she should leave You Must Obey, and by extension me (as part of Unity’s family), or else risk losing her husband.
Then Coyote decided to exploit her friendship with Kittlen’s middle child and egged on her griping against her mother. When I found out about this, I hit the roof. Coyote got a short, sharp message from me—she has crossed a line, and any further attacks on Kittlen would incur my wrath.
At that point, Coyote cut all links to both myself and Kittlen. However, she’d already wreaked enough damage. Kittlen and Penalt are barely on speaking terms, and their marriage hangs in the balance, And while she stopped directly attacking Kittlen, she continues to try and yank Kittlen’a chain from afar, using Penalt and others as her proxies. Meanwhile, Unity has gone away from Second Life for a while, and I’ve no idea when she will return.
Coyote’s antics left me trying to hold Kittlen together, on top of all of the other stuff I was dealing with in my personal life. It has taken her weeks to get over the shock of the hurt that both Coyote and Penalt inflicted on her, and be able to function again. There has been lots of cuddling and quiet time, as well as analysis and recriminations.
To put it bluntly, Kittlen was paying for Coyote’s friendship, both in monetary and emotional value. She had paid for Coyote’s DJ stream as well as her own and had gotten her gigs. And she had been Coyote’s protector against several abusive people online, the Greg mentioned above included.
There has been some light amidst the darkness of the last few months. Kittlen has been getting a lot of extra DJ gigs, including the ones she did for SL15B. And we have both been playing Minecraft. 🙂
Coyote, meanwhile, has big plans for her future. But I suspect she has burnt a lot of bridges and will burn many more. One of these days she will find herself stranded. It’s hard to build anything if you have a reputation for being a troublemaker.
And Penalt? He has chosen to take Coyote’s side against Kittlen. To the point where he let Coyote collar him in Second Life. To the point where Kittlen is probably going to throw him out of the house and divorce him. 🙁 I’ve talked to him, and he has no animosity towards me. But he refuses to budge one inch from his support for Coyote, or from his belief that both I and Kittlen are in a cult (YouMustObey). It hurts me to see all of this unfolding. I don’t hate Penalt. I wish it hadn’t come to this.
Looking back now, I can see the warning signs that Coyote had shown. Her readiness to lash out at people she disliked. Her harbouring of grudges. Her unwillingness to accept emotional support when she needed it. What I hadn’t foreseen was the length and depth she would go to hurt Kittlen, Unity, and by extension me. And all because we tried to help her.
Coyote, you are a marriage-wrecker, and for that, I cannot ever forgive you. Rest assured, that reputation is going to come around and bite you, hard.